Behind the Lens: A Self-Timed Family Photoshoot in My Studio (Geordie Style)
As a professional photographer in Newcastle, I’m used to capturing other families looking all graceful and poised in front of the camera. But when it’s my own family getting their photo taken? Well, let’s just say it’s a bit like trying to herd a group of Geordies into a taxi after a night out—chaotic, unpredictable, and filled with plenty of laughs.
The mission? To create some perfectly posed family portraits in my photography studio. The reality? A whirlwind of eye rolls, awkward smiles, and one too many “I swear I’ll look at the camera this time” moments. And somehow, in all that madness, we managed to get some absolute belters of shots.
1. The Vision: A Beautifully Posed Family Portrait (or So I Thought)
Now, I’ve been doing this for years, so I thought I had the perfect setup: professional camera? Check. Studio lighting? Sorted. Beautiful backdrop? Absolutely. But the moment you add a 16-year-old, a 9-year-old, and a husband who reallydoesn’t like getting his photo taken, things start to get a little… unpredictable.
I pictured the finished shot: a gorgeous, magazine-worthy family portrait hanging proudly in our living room, right next to the telly where we watch Geordie Shore reruns (of course). Easy, right? Well, turns out it’s not as simple as that when you’re working with your own family—especially in Newcastle, where everyone’s either too busy trying to look cool or too busy to care.
2. Meet the Cast: The “Not-So-Perfect” Models
- Me (The Photographer, Sort Of): Normally, I’m in full control of the shoot, but this time, I was in the hot seat—running back and forth between the camera and my family, adjusting poses while trying to look like I knew what I was doing. Spoiler: I didn’t.
- My Husband (The Fussing Fashionista): Ah, the Geordie dad who’s convinced his shirt’s going to make or break the family photo. Every time the timer went off, he was adjusting his collar, checking his cufflinks, and making sure his trousers weren’t wrinkled. At one point, he even gave me a look like he was ready for a runway show rather than a family portrait. Classic.
- My 16-Year-Old Son (The Jokester): As much as I tried to get him to take the shoot seriously, he was too busy telling my daughter jokes to stop for a moment. His mission? To make her laugh so hard that the whole family would dissolve into a fit of giggles. Mission accomplished. The only problem? He had a really good joke every 5 seconds, and my daughter’s laughter was contagious!
- My 9-Year-Old Daughter (The Comedian): The true star of the show. My daughter was all about the faces—mostly pulling funny ones while cracking up at her brother’s jokes. Every time I hit the timer, she’d go from posing like a model to doing her best “pufferfish” impression. She was a mix between Beyoncé at a photoshoot and a 9-year-old who just discovered how hilarious it is to mess around in front of a camera.
3. The Setup: Professional Gear, Geordie Chaos
With the professional camera on the tripod and the studio lighting just right, I was ready to start the shoot. I set the self-timer to 10 seconds—plenty of time to rush over and strike the perfect pose, right? Wrong.
First Take: I hit the timer and dashed to join the family. My husband was fiddling with his shirt, my son was mid-joke, and my daughter was doing her “funny face” with a look that could only be described as a mischievous potato. The shot was taken.
Result? A blurry, chaotic mess. My husband looked like he was posing for a catalogue ad, my son’s eyes were closed from laughing, and my daughter—well, she was clearly plotting her next face of pure chaos.
4. The Struggle: Trying to Get That Perfect Family Shot (In Between Laughs)
Let me tell you, trying to get this photo just right was like trying to take a picture of a dog running around in a park—impossible. But it wasn’t just the camera that was the issue; it was the constant motion of my family. Every time I set the timer and ran into position, I’d look at the shot and see:
- My husband adjusting his collar like he’s about to meet Alan Shearer for tea.
- My son cracking up and telling another joke that would have even the hardest of Geordie tough guys in stitches.
- My daughter pulling a face that only a 9-year-old would think was “adorable” (and honestly, it was).
In the middle of all this, I was running back and forth like a marathon runner at the Great North Run, just trying to get everyone to stop moving long enough to actually capture a shot. It was chaos, but it was our chaos.At this point, we’re all laughing so hard I can hardly catch my breath, let alone press the button again. But you know what? That’s when the real magic happens. The authentic moments—the laughter, the giggles, the odd eye-rolls—are what make these photos stand out. And honestly? They’re probably the best parts of family life in Newcastle.
5. The Final Shot: Victory Amidst the Chaos
After about 2947 takes (I’m exaggerating, but only a little), we finally captured them. Everyone was in the frame, no one was mid-laugh, and—miraculously—no one was adjusting their outfit. My husband’s shirt was finally perfect, my son had stopped telling jokes for two seconds, and my daughter had finally settled on a smile that didn’t involve her pulling faces like a character out of The Inbetweeners.
Click. Click. Click. It was done. And do you know what? The photos were beautiful. Despite all the laughter, all the chaos, and my constant running back and forth, we managed to capture the perfect family moment—the kind of shot that shows the love, the fun, and the slightly messy side of family life.
6. The Aftermath: Beautiful Chaos, Newcastle-Style
When I reviewed the photos afterward, I couldn’t help but laugh. Every single shot captured the essence of our family—a little chaotic, a little mad, but full of love and humour.
It turns out, family photoshoots don’t need to be perfect. They don’t need to be stiff and posed. Sometimes, the best moments are the ones that are completely unplanned—the bursts of laughter, the funny faces, the awkward moments where everyone’s just being themselves. It’s real life, and that’s what makes the photo so special. For blog purposes, I have shown our posed perfected images but if anyone wants a laugh, Ill certainly get out the outtakes!
7. Would I Recommend a Self-Timed Family Photoshoot in a Studio?
Absolutely! If you want to capture those perfectly posed moments, sure, go for it. But don’t forget that the heart of any great family photo is the real family—the funny faces, the jokes, the chaotic energy that makes you, well, you.
So, if you’re ever in Newcastle and want to try a self-timed photoshoot, grab your family, set the timer, and just go for it. Even if the final shot isn’t perfect (because honestly, what’s perfect about family life?), you’ll have a collection of memories that’ll make you smile for years.
And in the end, that’s the most important thing—laughter, love, and a touch of Geordie madness. Plus, let’s be honest, you can’t really go wrong with the Tyne Bridge in the background of those memories. Or maybe a cheeky trip to Quaysideafterward for some fish and chips, eh?
